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Most fans have a bumper sticker on their car, but would you
name your own child after a team legend? We've
all begged out of family commitments to watch
a game, but have you ever missed a wedding?
What about a funeral? Take the quiz and
find out how you rank against the fans in Rammer
Jammer Yellow Hammer.
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1. When my team is playing I |
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Rarely attend or watch live on TV. |
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Sometimes attend or watch on TV. |
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Often attend or watch on TV. |
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Always attend or watch on TV. |
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Always attend. |
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2. Including travel, tickets, beer, special cable subscription packages,
fan Web site fees, payments on an RV, etc. each year I spend roughly the
following amount on my team:
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Less than $100. |
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$100 - $500. |
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$501 - $1,000. |
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$1,001 -$5,000. |
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More than $5,000. |
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3. When I'm traveling far from home and I see someone wearing my team's
logo or colors, I
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Think it's a meaningless coincidence, and move on. |
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Think it's a meaningless coincidence, but nevertheless feel a curious pang of
camaraderie.
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Feel camaraderie and act on it, by offering the stranger a high five. |
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Wet myself, shout my team's slogan, bear hug the stranger, and tell him I love him. |
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4. In Rammer Jammer Yellow Hammer, we meet a couple who skipped their own daughter's
wedding in order to attend an Alabama - Tennessee game. I view this couple's behavior
as:
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Sickening -- beyond the pale. |
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Weird, but harmless. |
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Weird, but I definitely know where they're coming from. |
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A perfectly logical reaction to the thoughtlessness of the daughter,
who should’ve chosen another weekend to get hitched.
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5. When my team loses, I typically feel rotten for
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A few hours. |
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Several hours to a day. |
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Days. |
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Merely contemplating this question has reminded me of a
terrible loss I witnessed years ago, and now I am too depressed to answer.
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6. In Rammer Jammer Yellow Hammer, an Alabama football fan who desperately needs a heart
transplant chooses to RV to football games rather than to stay close enough to his
hospital to keep his place on the waiting list for a new heart.
The man’s explanation is that "Life without football isn’t worth living."
I find this line of reasoning |
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Psychotic. |
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Self-defeating, but not insane. |
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Profound, and thought provoking. |
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Freakin' beautiful -- I love you man! |
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7. I visit my favorite sports Web site
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Once a week. |
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A few times a week. |
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Every day. |
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Several times a day. |
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The way a crack addict hits the pipe. |
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8. In Rammer Jammer Yellow Hammer, author Warren St. John visits a reunion of 600+ people
who were named after Bear Bryant. I find the idea of naming a child after a football
coach:
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Bizarre. |
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Harmless. |
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It depends on the coach. |
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As the parent of young Paterno/Bowden/Osborne/Madden/etc.
Smithers, I’m deeply offended by this question.
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9. In Rammer Jammer Yellow Hammer, we meet Tony Brandino, a man who attended 500
consecutive Bama games, quitting only when a bout of the flu left him too ill to attend
game # 501. ("I felt like death warmed over," Brandino wrote in his memoir, FANtastic.
"My head was throbbing. My stomach felt like a canoe in the Gulf of Mexico. If I had made
it to the stadium, I would’ve puked on everyone.")
I think someone who goes to 500 consecutive football
games is
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Certifiably nuts. |
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A few ticket stubs short of a sky box, but not insane. |
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To be admired. |
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Off to a good start. |
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Answer TRUE or FALSE to the following:
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10. I own one of the following CDs: Who Let The Dawgs Out (Who! Who! Who!),
Whoop! There It Is, Jock Rock (the K-Tel compilation featuring "We are the Champions,"
the "Nah Nah Nah, Goodbye" song, etc.).
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True |
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False |
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11. I chose the color of my car with my team in mind.
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True |
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False |
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12. I can identify and/or have consumed one of the following:
P.G.A., a pink panty pulldown, a Bama Bomb, a baloney log.
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True |
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False |
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13. I have surreptitiously listened to a game on headphones in a house of worship.
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True |
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False |
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14. I have lied to my spouse or children about my whereabouts in order to watch a game.
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True |
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False
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15. My will stipulates that I will be buried in a team jersey or a customized coffin
with my team logo on the lid.
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True |
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False |
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